“For as it was well said of the great Africanus that he was never less alone than when alone, so, in our philosophy, no parts of this universal frame are less to be called solitarie than those which the vulgar esteem most solitarie, since the withdrawing of men and beasts signifieth but the greater frequency of more excellent creatures.”
- C.S. Lewis, “Out of the Silent Planet”
I know that might seem confusing to some of you. It was to me when I first read it. Now, I’m not going to explain the rest of the book to you — I suggest you read it yourself! A lot of good things in there. This quote being one of them. Let’s start off with a story, though.
6th grade. First day of middle school. Since 2nd grade, I’ve always been in the “Gifted” program, and in elementary it didn’t mean much. Just an extra class in the afternoon, regular class the rest of the day. But in middle school it meant that I had no classes with my elementary school friends. I had special Gifted classes with people I didn’t know. I was alone. I remember that first day so well. I came home and immediately started crying, hugging my mom, and complaining that I had no friends. Perhaps that’s when I first gave in to conformity. I was willing to do ANYTHING just so that I didn’t have to be alone. As you could probably tell, that didn’t turn out so well. I strayed away from God, did some things I wasn’t proud of, and disappointed a lot of people. I’m only beginning to understand how dangerous it was for me to hate being alone. It’s not like I should have been an anti-social freak that doesn’t talk to anyone, but I should have realized that I don’t NEED people in order to feel satisfied.
This year, I learned to love being alone. My schedule was weird, so I don’t have lunch with any of my friends. I was sort of bummed at first, but it really gave me an opportunity to get closer to God by reading my Bible everyday during lunch. I didn’t think I would love being alone, yet I do. And today I realized why it feels so good.
As I said, that quote up there confused me at first. Then I read it, and put in my own words. This is what I came up with: When you are alone you are actually the least alone because separating yourself from men and animals brings you to the presence of higher beings. I thought that was a bit weird until I thought about my personal experiences. When I am completely alone somewhere, I forget about other people and just feel totally surrounded by God. And when I feel like that, I don’t feel alone at all. I actually feel the LEAST alone.
I hope that all of you remember that. Don’t be afraid of being by yourself. Being alone doesn’t make you lonely. If your mind is in the right place, being alone will cause the opposite effect. So I challenge you guys to have “alone time”. Separate yourself from people for some amount of time and read your Bible, pray to God, sing to God, or do a combination of the three. Just completely immerse yourself in His presence. Trust me, it feels incredible.
“A deep deep flood, an Ocean flows from You
Of deep deep love, yeah it’s filling up the room
Your innocent blood, has washed my guilty life
In Your presence God I’m completely satisfied.”
- Phil Wickham, “Divine Romance”
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